Great, we already got tits. Now we just need someone to flame.

you need to NSFW tag your crap.

I gots a squirrel! :oP

Where is Zellio2009 when you need him?

Aren't YOU self-proclaimed troll?

I'll start the ball rolling. GOG is a piece of crap undeserving of anyone's attention. The only good thing is...wait there's nothing good, save your money on GOG's catalogue and go buy some sanitary pads instead

I think the best thing about this thread is that it continued to thrive even while I hadn't responded to it yet. Props to all of you guys! And now it's wonderfully off-topic! More props!
Anyway, here's the story. One of my many names is fuzzymonkey41 (don't ask) and so when I signed up for a Steam account, I wanted to put a monkey in my avatar. I spent a long time looking at monkeys but didn't really get the right feeling from any of them. I finally decided on this lemur dude (even though he's definitely not a monkey, per se) because he is a badass.
The "monkey man" part of my profile is just the vestigial stuff from my great ambitions to truly be a monkey.
But doesn't EVERYONE want to be a monkey? OF COURSE.

Dear sir, I apologize if you find this offensive, but the majority of us here are unsanitary and do not wish to be sanitary.
Please refrain from continuing these suggestions as many are sensitive to being unsanitary, but are too lazy to do anything about it.

I've never seen a kangaroo before, but now that I've seen one, I guess I should move to Australia.

*cough* Right, you - you smelly person, I don't care if you think GOG is crap when you don't back it up with an alternative. For example I think Onlive is going to beat Steam hands down for digital delivery, not to mention the FACT loads of people are stopping using Steam because they're fed up with its poor service.
As for GOG, they really need to get with the program. Releasing games without DRM? I've seen them pirated all over the place, and beside that the PC is a dead format anyway. There is so many high quality console games with equally great hardware, there is little point in Steam or even Gametap competing with them.
Frankly I'm just on this Forum to make sure all you tin-foilers keep it real. I bet not even one of you have balled a n00b in Halo. Weak.
Was that good enough? :)

I recently became sanitary but I am unsure of where my loyalties lie right now. Will GOG expel me for being too clean? I believe that Weclock may be silencing some very poignant remarks about hygiene that we all could benefit from. The truth must be revealed!

It was not good enough. I almost laughed at your petty, unoriginal insults directed at stagnant, uninteresting topics that have been thoroughly chewed and digested. But I didn't laugh because you weren't funny.
You are an uncreative dimwit with the tact of a gorilla driving a Honda through a tidal pool.
Let's be honest; if what you just did resembled anything remotely like a troll, I was the billy-goat that just completely destroyed you.

Dear Sir,
I find it insulting that you would insinuate that I could be so sinister, I also find it appalling that you would be so clean, yet you say you wish to be a monkey. Clearly, you are conflicted and need a good schooling, perhaps you should consider moving to the great continent of Africa and commune with your brothers and sisters.
Thank you,
Weclock

I find it insulting that you would slander monkey hygiene in public; for your information, I already have lived with monkeys for 4 years, and you would do well to learn from some of the more simple lessons of monkeyhood. Cleanliness and being a monkey are not mutually exclusive events. I am horrified by your ignorance and hope you will remedy your stupidity as soon as the speed of your brain allows.
Thank you,
Ogodosh

Dear cullionly tickle-brained flirt-gill!
The reasoning behind the classification of apes as dirty creatures, comes from the long history of diseases one can get from apes, the one that stands out the most is AIDS, but there are quite a few others, shigellosis, the Marburg Agent virus, ebola and poliomyelitis. I highly recommend that you do further research into the study of these creatures to learn just how unhygienic they are. If you spend word for word with me, I shall make your wit bankrupt. Thou clay-brained guts, thou knotty-pated fool, thou whoreson obscene greasy tallow-catch!
Sincerely,
Weclock

Smooth...
Now...
XBOX360 RULZ and PS3 SUX!!
/take cover