I love the game and all and I can't wait for AA3 to come out, but seriously, this is just ridiculous.
Speaking of which, you should reserve your AA3 username before it's taken.

Meh I used to play AA in the Teamwarfare League but ever since hackers have become so prevalent I haven't bothered playing it much. After the full auto M203s and other bullshit it kind of ruined the game for me especially since I have played since it was first released. I haven't seen much change or even added gameplay to even make me bother to download it again and they are so vague about what they are adding into AA3 I'm not going to probably bother to take a look. Changing engines just isn't enough to interest me.

Thats absoutely hilarious. I mean i have seen plenty of propaganda in my time but thats pretty awesome.
Ah the Democratic Republic of the Ostregals. Can you be a democratic republic? they are two different styles of government after all. so where is this politically confused place meant to be?

They are not mutually exclusive. Republic simply infers that a country's governmental authority is derived from the people as opposed to a hereditary ruler, Monarch or divine leader.
Both the US and China are Republics yet have very different systems of Governance because the method by which power is derived from the people differs greatly.
The word Democratic can be used to broadly explain the form of political structure in place, where the leader and/or leading party are directly elected by the people. For a real world example see the Democratic Republic of Congo.
However, having Democratic in a country's name does not necessarily mean it is a democracy, for instance the official name of North Korea is actually the Democratic People's Republic of Korea, even though it is actually a one party state.

I was going to play AA again recently, but I downloaded the client needed to download the installer, and the downloader was downloading the game at a rate of 24 kb/s. If there's another way to get the game, I'm all ears.
And it's not that surprising the US Army would create a graphic novel. They'll do anything to convince us to suit up and fight for them.

That reminds me of one of my favourite Penny Arcade comics...
You should be able to grab a full installer for 2.8.3 from somewhere like Fileplanet, Gamershell, etc., then update to 2.8.3.1, followed by 2.8.4 and finally 2.8.5.
Here's a link to the 2.8.3 client on Fileplanet, if it helps - the rest are in a "Patches" directory.